Over the past few posts, I’ve highlighted leadership lessons that I took from each episode of Ted Lasso. Hopefully by now you’ve had a chance to see the show, and I hope you laughed and learned as much as I did along the way. Maybe you took some of the same messages I did from each episode; maybe you found other bits of wisdom that resonated more with you than what I’ve written about here. Looking back, I’d like to take one more chance to highlight my favorite leadership lesson from each episode, and maybe reflect on it a little differently this time. Because, the more I think of these, they’re not just leadership lessons; they’re life lessons.
SPOILER ALERT: From this point forward, I will be writing about specific scenes and quotes from the show. Please make sure to watch the episode in question before reading on; it’s worth it. This post will include content from all ten episodes of season one.
CONTENT ALERT: Ted Lasso is written for adults. They use language I would never use in school or a work environment and there are sexual references in many episodes. None of it personally bothers me, but it might bother some viewers.
So, without further ado; eleven lessons from ten episodes of Ted Lasso…
Title Sequence: Be the change. The title sequence for each episode shows Ted Lasso sitting in the middle of Richmond stadium’s blue seats. As he does so, his seat changes color from blue to red, and then the neighboring chairs begin to change color too until we see a wide-shot of red chairs spelling the name Ted Lasso. Culture spreads. Great leaders identify the influencers of their organization (pro tip: this often has little to do with official titles) and work with them (along with other early adopters) to effect change. But this is a lesson for life as well. Your actions have an immediate impact on those closest to you, but that impact has the power to spread and impact others, even people you’ve never met. There are obvious and historical examples of this: Gandhi’s actions impacted the work of the Reverend Martin Luther King Jr. whose actions and words continue to impact us today. But your actions don’t have to take place on an international scale and involve movie rights to effect change. If you want the world to be a kinder place, be kind. If you would like to see people putting others first, overtly act with others’ benefit in mind. Ted wants to create a culture on his team that embraces positivity, a team first attitude, and hard work. So, that’s how he acts, and by the end of the season, his players do too.
Episode 1: Start with building belief. One of Coach Lasso’s first acts is to hang a hand-written sign that states simply “BELIEVE” above the door to his office and overlooking the locker room. Later in the season we learn that Ted actually has many such signs of assorted sizes spread throughout his apartment as well. We also hear Ted refer to the importance of belief throughout the series. For example, earlier in the first episode Ted responded to Rebecca’s question of whether he believed in ghosts with the joke that “I do, but more importantly I believe they need to believe in themselves.” In the next episode, he tells a mumbling Nate that, “I’m sorry, I have trouble hearing people who don’t believe in themselves.” The message is simple, recurrent, and profound: all success begins with the basic belief that one can succeed. It sounds easy and maybe a little too simple, but too often we fail for the basic reason that we never believed we were going to be successful in the first place. So, the next time you find yourself doubting your abilities, try a little positive self-talk. Tell yourself you can do it, focus on the preparation you’ve gone through that has readied you for the task, visualize its successful completion and how you’ll feel when it’s over and you’ve accomplished what you set out to do, and manifest it into reality.
Episode 2: Observe, ask, listen, then act. Ted doesn’t begin his first full day as the new coach of AFC Richmond by changing the lineup, game plan, or team colors. He watches practice, talks to the employees and the players, learns about their history and their personal stories, and then asks what they need to be successful. Yes, it’s a 30-minute comedy and in this case it’s done using a suggestion box made with a child’s shoe-box and the first act is to fix the shower-heads in the locker room, but the point is the same. Leaders should get to know their organization and its members and they should give those team members a voice in the decision-making process where appropriate. This builds ownership and trust throughout the organization. Suddenly, everyone has a chance to be a part of the solution, and it’s a whole lot harder to complain about the solution when you had a voice in crafting it. Here’s the catch though, and the life lesson: you can’t ask a question if you’re not willing to hear the answer. In this case, Ted asked his players what they needed. Once they told him, he needed to act. When we ask for input and then disregard or dismiss the feedback what we’re telling people is we really don’t care what others have to say. In terms of leadership, this has exactly the opposite effect on the organization that we’re looking for. In life, it results in people not being able to trust us. Instead of building trust and ownership, you’re left with mistrust and disenfranchisement. No organization, or person, can be successful with that type of toxicity.
Episode 3: Clearly and consistently communicate your “why.” Ted Lasso says multiple times in the first few episodes and then throughout the season that he does not measure success by counting wins and losses. When asked by the (at this point) antagonistic reporter Trent Crimm to clarify, Ted doubles-down on this response, knowing all the while that his message is not landing with a positive effect in the reporters’ room, the fans, or even with some of the players. Why? Because, Ted knows himself, his purpose, and how he is going to achieve it. He also knows that the only way to build the culture he needs to achieve his goal is to communicate his purpose clearly and repeatedly until everyone understands it on their own terms. As far as straight-up leadership lessons go, this is my favorite from the season. My “why” is to help others be and become their best selves. I tell our students, their parents, faculty and staff every chance I get. I’ve written that sentence multiple times in this blog over the past few posts. I want everyone who works with me to know that’s why we’re here, so we can accomplish it together. Leaders have to clearly and consistently make their vision known, but I also think everyone should whether in a position of leadership of not. Put your values and life’s purpose right out where everyone can see them. Wear them on your sleeve. You end up surrounded by exactly the right people to help you achieve your goals and are one step closer to lesson one: being the change.
Episode 4: Be honest; be kind. I think it’s really important to be honest and transparent in actions and deeds. Just, you know, as a person. But I also don’t think honesty is enough. I’m not perfect, but I really try to ask myself if what I’m saying is both honest and kind. We’ve probably all met that person who uses honesty as a weapon, but being honest with someone for the purpose of hurting them is just cruel. As a leader, it’s important the create a culture that is supportive of the individuals’ and therefore the team’s wellbeing and growth. Leaders simply cannot tolerate bullying or cruelty in any form. But again, this one goes well beyond a lesson in leadership. The world would simply be an easier place if we asked ourselves before we spoke, “Is this honest? Is this kind?”
Episode 5: Put the team first. This is the episode where Ted implores Jamie, and the rest of the team, to make the extra pass. We learn later why Jamie is so focused on individual accomplishments and it’s a reminder that everyone is carrying an invisible weight that colors their perspectives and influences their performance. It’s important that we understand this. Put another way: assume the other person is doing the best they can. In any interaction, you simply don’t know how their history or morning commute has impacted their present mood or readiness to engage with you in the moment. This being said, leaders should offer opportunities to team members to grow personally as well as professionally when they can, though not at the long-term expense of the team. We need to build team-first cultures in which all individuals see team accomplishments as the goal and individual accomplishments as a means to achieve the goal, not the other way around.
Episode 6: Preparation matters. From an entertainment standpoint, this is my favorite moment of the season. Watching Ted Lasso deliver the “We’re talking about practice!” rant from the coach’s perspective is comedic gold to me. But more importantly, this is a great lesson in life, leadership, and organizational effectiveness. Preparation dictates performance. For this reason, leaders should ensure that team members are expected to prepare and collaborate in that preparation. Sports teams practice; teachers engage in collaborative planning, training, assessment moderation, etc. I’m sure in every field there are plenty of opportunities for team members to work together as a part of the process in order to achieve the product. As individuals we have to remember this too. It is the process, the preparation, the day-to-day grind of getting better at our chosen hobby or profession that will ultimately result in our success.
Episode 7: Tomorrow, the sun will rise. Ok, so that’s not a quote from the show. It’s actually part of a quote from the movie Castaway that continues “who knows what the tide will bring.” I know, because I like it so much it’s actually a tattoo on my arm. It reminds me every day that, no matter what happens, life absolutely will go on. So why am I writing about this here? Because this is the episode in which Ted reminds his players that they haven’t played the game yet that they’re all assuming they’re going to lose. The point is this: anxiety about the future is destructive and a total waste of time. You absolutely do NOT know what’s going to happen in the future. You may assume some things about tomorrow, the next day, or beyond, but you have absolutely no control over what may come to pass. For some people this is scary, but to me it’s incredibly empowering. This is because of what I can control: my actions and intentions right now. What a relief! I can stop stressing over things that may never happen and start focusing on what is right in front of me, right now, that I absolutely can influence!
Episode 8: Be curious, not judgmental. It’s true; the first time I watched Ted win the dart game and give this speech I may have gotten a little misty-eyed. Because he’s right. People’s judgements say way more about them than they do about the other people they’re judging. And we’re so quick, all of us, to judge. From judging what other people wear to who they should love, “this is right; that is wrong” thinking may be the root cause of every violent act, physically or otherwise, we’re like to encounter as individuals. All I can say is, I aspire to be more curious moving forward.
Episode 9: Practice forgiveness with yourself and others. At the start of the 2020-2021 school year I wrote a presentation to our faculty that focused on “leading forward.” Part of the strategies we discussed, a big part, was that we were all learning together how to educate and support students in a virtual environment in the midst of a historic, global pandemic. I told them that if we had any hope of being successful, we were going to have to practice both self-forgiveness and forgiveness of others. Self-forgiveness because we were bound to make mistakes. Who could expect perfection as we set about accomplishing a momentous task no one had even ever attempted before? And forgiveness for others because they were doing the same. We had to be vulnerable, and share with one another, our students, and their families that we were doing the best that we could but we’re not expecting perfection. We had to be empathetic, and remember that they were doing the same. But there doesn’t have to be a global pandemic for these strategies to work. Vulnerability in leadership builds trust and authenticity. Empathy allows us to understand and therefore address the needs of others.
Episode 10: Be a goldfish. Season One is almost bookended with Ted Lasso telling players to “be a goldfish.” I don’t know the accuracy of the science here, but the lesson is important: leaders who inspire team members to be curious, creative, risk-takers have to be able to accept that the team will fail-forward from time to time. And for this, they need to be able to accept, learn, and move forward. For Ted, this means not judging the team’s (or his) performance simply by counting wins and losses. He knows that the hours of practice and preparation matter, the improvement of skills and team performance matter, and that the personal growth of each member of his team matters. As a high school principal, I have to remember that student grades are one data-point when measuring success. But I also have to take into account students’ personal growth, their social-emotional wellbeing, their development of empathy and practice of acts of service, and many other factors too. I have to understand that as long as a teachers’ actions are in line with our goal of helping students to be and become their best selves, it’s ok if they try a new strategy or tool and it doesn’t work as expected. I have to ask them what they’ve learned, what they’ll do differently next time, and how I can support them in helping our students succeed. Not everything we try is going to work, and not everyone is going to be happy all of the time. In this way, as a leader and a person, I have to be a goldfish in order to leave the momentary stress, doubt, and feeling of failure behind.
What’s Next: I read yesterday that season two of Ted Lasso is currently being written and that the series has already been renewed for a third season. I have no idea where the writers plan to take the show in the future, but I am hopeful that it will be as funny, smart, honest, and insightful. I think it will, because I too believe in the Ted Lasso Way.
Please Come to the Principal’s Office 