I have new favorite show. Ted Lasso, on AppleTV, tells the story of an American football coach who goes to England to coach a soccer (also football, everywhere but the US) club. It’s surprisingly funny and heart-warming, and it’s shockingly smart. So smart that, as I watched episodes the first time through, I found myself thinking repeatedly about how I wanted to be more like Ted Lasso in my role as a high school principal. Every episode contains lessons that leaders can use in probably any work environment to help them support and therefore get the most out of their team members, and I’ve already begun to draw on these lessons in my professional practice. So, I did what I almost never do; I watched the series again. This time I took notes, and what will follow here and for the next few posts are my notes and thoughts about the leadership lessons of Ted Lasso and other characters from the show.
SPOILER ALERT: From this point forward, I will be writing about specific scenes and quotes from the show. Please make sure to watch the episode in question before reading on; it’s worth it. This post will include content from Episode 8: The Diamond Dogs and Episode 9: All Apologies.
CONTENT ALERT: Ted Lasso is written for adults. They use language I would never use in school or a work environment and there are sexual references in many episodes. None of it personally bothers me, but it might bother some viewers.
So, without further ado…
Episode 8: The Diamond Dogs
“Be curious, not judgmental”
Ted’s words are so perfect here that I’m not sure there’s something I could add without diminishing the message and its impact. “Be curious, not judgmental” has already become my new, personal motto. Thank you, Ted Lasso and Walt Whitman.
I will say that I think curiosity is probably the most underrated attribute of an effective learning environment. Curiosity is what drives learning and innovation, and creativity (its natural result) has already become the currency of the modern job market. Educational leaders must, therefore, intentionally build a culture that incentivizes students’ curiosity by giving them opportunities to develop and ponder their own questions as well as the ability to grapple with difficult, authentic problems. This is why I believe so firmly in entrepreneurial thinking as a learning modality in today’s schools. By giving students opportunities to exercise their curiosity through the identification of questions/problems aligned to the content but relevant to them, and then the freedom to exercise creativity by ideating original solutions and iterating multiple attempts at those solutions without fear of punitive responses to failing forward, we unleash the students’ natural creative energies and enthusiasms. We spark the figurative fire of their curiosities.
Beyond that, I think there’s a message here for organizational leaders centered on the importance of creating cultures that avoid judgmental or “closed-minded” thinking in favor of curiosity and “openness” to new ideas. Predictive logic (basing decisions on past circumstances and their outcomes) is less efficient and less reliable today than ever before. This is due to an exponential increase in the rate of change due to technological innovations and increased diversity of thought that has thankfully come about with the globalization and resulting diversification of the workplace. In its place, creative logic (the ability to ideate a unique solution and act quickly, refining the solution in real time as learning occurs) has become a more important tool in almost all fields. For this reason, leaders should encourage active participation and collaborative problem-solving in order to unleash the individual and collective potential of every member of the team.
I have to mention that I think there is a moral obligation in leadership to “be curious, not judgmental.” This is why we should, as Stephen Covey puts it, seek first to understand. My experience has been that leaders too often snap to judgement and set about addressing issues before they are fully understood. This type of reactive thinking can be horribly detrimental to the organization’s ability to achieve its goals, and to staff morale as team members default to fear-based decision making.
Finally, we also have a moral obligation to create cultures of inclusivity that celebrate diversity. This is more to the point of Ted Lasso’s actual meaning in the episode. A victim of judgmental thinking himself, Ted points out that had others been more curious in their approach to him, they would have learned about and focused on his strengths rather than on what made him different. My personal experience has been that people spend so much time focused on the 10% of things that make us different, they completely disregard the 90% of things that make us similar. This is true in terms of gender, race, economic standing, politics, and religion. The thing is, that 90% would make us unstoppable in our pursuits if we could only see them for what they are: collaborative strengths. And if we could do that; if we could truly recognize all of the ways in which we are the same, it might give us the ability to celebrate our differences for what they are: also a strength. The problem, I think, is that we fear that which we do not understand. So, it is a leaders job to increase understanding by encouraging curiosity and modeling an approach that is as free from ill-informed, judgmental thinking as possible.
Episode 9: All Apologies
“I forgive you.”
I’ve written quite a bit in the past about my admiration for Brené Brown and her work; this scene pretty much sums it up. Rebecca admits to herself and to Ted the full weight of her actions. Acting in response to her own sense of shame and resulting hurt, she has betrayed Ted from the start. Ted, acting out of empathy, forgives her. Empathy is a leader’s most powerful tool; it should be used generously. In this case it helps that just a few episodes ago Ted was signing divorce papers and so is going through a similar situation to Rebecca himself, but as the saying goes, “there but for the grace of God go I.” Great leaders put themselves in the shoes of others, forgive, support, and move forward.
“All that matters Roy Kent, is what you think about Roy.”
Roy Kent is being demoted and he doesn’t know how to define himself if he’s not a footballer. Keeley, in her amazing, sarcastic wisdom asks Roy’s niece to help by closing her eyes and describing her uncle. Not one word about football is uttered.
We are not our jobs. Leaders know, and help others to understand, that our careers are a means by which we express our purpose, but they are not our purpose. For example, I am a high school principal. Before that, I served as a teacher, school administrator, ropes course facilitator, and camp counselor. None of these are my purpose or the sum of who I am as a person. My purpose is to help others be and become their best selves. I express that through my work as an educational leader. My “why” and my “what” are not the same, but knowing my “why” certainly has helped me to choose a “what” at which I can be successful and of service. Here, Keeley is helping Roy to understand that being a first-team all-star is not his “why.” It will be interesting to see how the show’s writers (the actor playing Roy Kent is actually one of them) will continue Roy’s progression towards this understanding in the rest of this season and the next.
“Believe”
As the credits roll on the episode, Roy Kent is alone in the locker room, preparing for his first practice as a newly demoted member of the second team. There is no dialogue here, but as Roy stands and leaves the room he pauses in front of Coach Lasso’s “believe” sign and reaches up to tap it before joining his teammates. This demotion at the end of his long and illustrious career is a heart-breaker for Roy, but he doesn’t quit for exactly this reason: Ted has given him a vision worth believing in and playing for. Leaders can’t underestimate or over-communicate the power of a clear, inspiring vision.
Please Come to the Principal’s Office 